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Sunday, December 07, 2003

Paris Hilton Sex Tape Mocked!! 

This is a funny take on the Paris Hilton Sex Video

Paris Hilton Sex Tape!

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Paris Hilton and pal Nicole Richie remain dense and unlikable down on the farm 

The Seattle Times: Arts & Entertainment: Paris Hilton and pal Nicole Richie remain dense and unlikable down on the farm: "Whoever advised 'With the rich, always a little patience' never tried to watch 'The Simple Life.'
In the short stretch since Paris Hilton's sex video, Michael Jackson's arrest and Prince Charles' nondenial denial of palace hanky-panky, we've been reminded that viewers love a train wreck if the passenger is traveling first-class.
But money alone can't buy TV love; an essential part of the comeuppance formula remains star-quality entertainment. That's why we relish Jackson's regally deluded peace sign at his surrender and Charles' consistently disastrous on-camera 'dialogues' with the public.
Hilton, on the other hand, is an amateur. Prior to Internet overexposure, she moved mostly in the pages of InStyle and Vanity Fair, her only clear assets being the Hilton name, the Hilton money and free hotel rooms for life.
Then Fox signed Hilton and friend Nicole Richie, daughter of Lionel, to a novel reality concept. 'The Simple Life' would place them with a salt-of-the-earth family in Arkansas and the audience presumably would enjoy the pair's hilarious difficulties adjusting to a rural, working existence.





The resulting half-hour series debuts tomorrow night at 8:30 (KCPQ-TV).
If any network should know how to work a magical blend of haute humiliation, it's Fox. Already home to satirical classic 'The Simpsons,' Fox has the season's most brilliant new comedy, 'Arrested Development,' which offers a scathingly funny indictment of the feckless rich.
Yet much like Paris' pallid bit of pornography, 'The Simple Life' apparently was more fun in the making than in the watching.
The fault lies with the stars "

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Paris HIlton Checks In 

:: Xinhuanet - English ::: "On a gray, gusty autumn afternoon in a city preparing for an incoming storm, Paris Hilton manages to steal even Mother Nature's thunder.
Months before snippets of her private sex video became public, the now-infamous Hilton hotels heiress arrives for lunch nearly three hours late. She's here to promote her Fox reality series The Simple Life, premiering tonight (8:30 p.m. ET/PT). The show, shot in five weeks in rural Arkansas, has her and pal Nicole Richie roughing it on a farm to prove that they're not idle, spoiled rich girls who don't know what Wal-Marts or water wells are.
'I was playing a character,' drawls Hilton, 22. 'I'm totally normal. I think it's obnoxious when people demand limos or bodyguards. I eat at McDonald's or Taco Bell. My parents always taught us to be humble. We're not spoiled.'
The we refers to her sidekick Nicky, 20. Together, they're the Hilton sisters, two platinum-blond party hoppers who've never met a red carpet or camera they didn't love. Until, that is, a three-minute highlight reel of the 27-minute sex tape Paris made with then-boyfriend Rick Salomon three years ago somehow surfaced on the Internet in November. "

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Paris Hilton Sex Tape Scandal Update Feature Story Paris Hilton Sex Tape Scandal Update 

Paris Hilton Sex Tape Scandal Update Feature Story Paris Hilton Sex Tape Scandal Update: "Rick Salomon has filed a $10 million lawsuit against Paris Hilton, her parents, and publicist, for alleged slander and defamation of character. The lawsuit came after a 3-year-old video of Paris Hilton, the 22-year-old great-granddaughter of Conrad Hilton, founder of the Hilton hotel chain, was sold on the Internet.

Salomon, the 33-year-old former boyfriend of Paris, claims a video that Paris willingly made with him while having sex in a hotel room, was stolen, copied and circulated by a former roommate, Donald Thrasher, who sold it to a Seattle-based porn internet company. Salomon accuses the Hilton family of retaliating by trying to portray him as a rapist, after they claimed the girl was incapacitated. He has filed a second suit for $10 million against Marvad Corp., alleging they distributed the video with illegal rights, copyright infringement, and invasion of privacy. "

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Paris Hilton, America's True Sweetheart By Dorothy Woodend 

Forums - Paris Hilton, America's True Sweetheart By Dorothy Woodend: "Paris Hilton, America's True Sweetheart By Dorothy Woodend, AlterNet

If pretty is as pretty does, then beautiful people have a lot to answer for. They've been up to some ugly business lately. They steal each other's mates on Temptation Island, eat cockroaches and pig guts on Fear Factor, and spit poison behind each other backs on 'America's Next Top Model.'


And we can't get enough of it.


We love to watch them betray their dark and venal hearts and display their moral vacuity as they sell their sleek skins for the almighty buck. Punishing the pretty is big sport, from Hunting Bambi, an apocryphal story about shooting bikini clad babes with paint pellets, to any number of modern horror movies like 'Scream,' 'Cabin Fever,' and 'Jeepers Creepers,' where they're dispatched by the dozen.


Witness the gleeful feeding frenzy over Paris Hilton, the Pamela Anderson for a new generation. The universal licking of chops at the undoing of the impossibly slender, fabulously blond, revoltingly rich heiress resulted in a worldwide epidemic of wet lips. Paris Hilton is a 'stupid, spoiled, superficial socialite who dresses like a high-class escort and, given the recently disclosed pornographic video she made with an ex-boyfriend, probably acts like one too,' or so says a recent profile of her in Rolling Stone Magazine. Hilton may have youth, beauty and money (an estimated inheritance of $30 million) but she is most famous for being fatuous. "

.......

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Man sued over Paris Hilton's video 

Man sued over Paris Hilton's video: "An Internet porn company that hoped to distribute an X-rated home video of Paris Hilton and her ex-boyfriend Richard Salomon has filed a breach of contract lawsuit against Salomon's former roommate for more than $10 million.
Seattle-based Marvad Corp. filed its complaint in federal court Friday against Donald Thrasher of Los Angeles, who sold Marvad the video. The lawsuit alleges Thrasher misled the company into believing he owned the rights to the video.
The company 'suffered substantial damages arising out of the misrepresentations by Thrasher and his agents,' according to the lawsuit.
'There was millions of dollars at stake here,' Marvad publicist Kevin Blagg said."

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Paris Hilton Video Turns Paraguay Into World's 3rd Richest Economy 

Demand for the Paris Hilton sex video
has lifted the struggling country of Paraguay into an economic powerhouse with which the rest of the world must reckon.



November alone saw gross domestic production in the South America country rise an astounding 1,000,000,000,000 percent. The video has caused Paraguay, ranked 128th in terms of economy production last year, to climb dramatically into third place on the world financial leaderboard, behind only the United States and Japan.



“We haven't seen this kind of a turnaround since the Rob Lowe video boosted the Turkish economy. Not even Burma enjoyed as much success following the Pamela-Tommy Lee tape,” said Roger Duwee, a leading analyst in the homemade porno sector.



Speaking on behalf of his fellow countrymen, Paraguayan President Nicanor Duarte remarked: “Hey, this is better than sitting on a stash of oil. That semi-talented chick turned our economy around overnight.

Chortler -- Paris Hilton Video Turns Paraguay Into World's 3rd Richest Economy

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Farm Boy Carrying Torch for Paris Hilton 

"It's a love story that could go down in Hollywood's history books: The socialite and the farm boy.


Two different worlds, two separate lives ... and at least one broken heart.
Paris Hilton (search), the airhead star of Fox's reality series 'The Simple Life,' fell hard for 18-year-old Arkansas kid Trae Lindley.
Their small-town affair -- to be aired nationally -- led to Lindley's split-up with his high-school sweetheart. While Paris has cooled on him, he's still carrying a torch for her. And in Altus (search) -- population 817 -- it's become the talk of the town.
When the celebrated hotel chain heiress came to Altus to film episodes of her TV show, she set her sights on Lindley. "

MORE- Farm Boy Carrying Torch for Paris Hilton

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Paris Hilton Nearly Upstages Al Sharpton on 'SNL' 

Democratic presidential candidate Al Sharpton (search) portrayed lawyer Johnnie Cochran, a sushi salesman and one of the three wise men searching for Jesus during his host stint on "Saturday Night Live."



He was also confronted with a track suit-wearing vision of his former self, even singing a few verses of "I Feel Good" during a respectable James Brown (search) imitation.

Sharpton, though, was nearly upstaged by reality TV and inadvertent video star Paris Hilton (search), who appeared in a double-entendre filled "interview" with Jimmy Fallon.

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Sex video gives Paris Hilton publicity money can't buy  

She is a party-loving socialite heiress whose amateur sex video fuelled an internet frenzy and sparked a multi-million dollar lawsuit against the world's most famous hotel-owning family.
But as Paris Hilton pleads her embarrassment and regret at the damage done to the family name, suspicions are growing that the entire episode might have been one giant and well-timed publicity stunt designed to further the career of America's newest celebrity obsession.

The scandal broke just before last week's television premiere of a new reality show starring 22-year-old Hilton, blonde great-granddaughter of hotel empire founder Conrad Hilton, who with her younger sister, Nicky, stands to inherit up to $30 million of the family's estimated $5.2bn fortune.

The Simple Life, in which the pampered Hilton and best friend and fellow 'heirhead' Nicole Richie, daughter of pop star Lionel Richie, swap the Beverly Hills and New York party circuits for 30 days working on an Arkansas farm, was panned by critics yet still attracted 13 million viewers.

'It all seems very convenient and worked just right for her in the run-up to the show,' said Cynthia Cotts, a respected columnist on New York's Village Voice newspaper, which has been following Hilton's rise from obscurity.

'It's impossible to know what drove the release of the sex tape, but I look at who benefits and that's Fox TV and Paris Hilton. Whether she actually came up with this hare-brained scheme herself is irrelevant when you look at the publicity it attracted.'

Excerpts of the grainy three-year-old tape, shot in night-vision and featuring Hilton and former boyfriend Rick Salomon engaged in various sexual acts, became one of the year's hottest internet downloads, despite a deal reached between the Hilton family and porn company Marvad Corp to prevent copies of the 27-minute video being sold commercially.

Hilton's parents, Rick and Kathy, say they will take legal action against anyone seeking to distribute the tape and are in turn being sued for $10 million by Salomon for defamation. He claims that the family and their publicist, Siri Garber, have in effect accused him of rape following suggestions that Hilton was underage or incapacitated when the film was shot.

Those who have seen the tape describe it as average, with notorious radio DJ Howard Stern rating the action as 'four out of 10' at best. The highlight is when Hilton, who is fully aware of the camera's presence, leaps off the bed to answer her mobile telephone.


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